I had to look back over my posting history to see if I had written this post before. If I have, I used a different title or deleted the post so I guess I’ll never know. The reason I feel like I’ve written this before is because I’ve wanted to write it at times and I have said bits and pieces about it in the past. So here are my musings on old friends. I’ll probably say more some day in the future, when I’m older and wiser, but for now this will have to suffice.
Since I’ve left high school, I’ve noticed that I have three types of old friends.
1) The Ones You Never Speak to Again
This is the friend who was part of your friend group in high school but you probably knew you weren’t going to keep up with them in college. The reason for the separation is different for everyone. You may have different interests or you just may not have been great friends to begin with but for whatever reason you rarely see this person after high school.
2) The Ones You Always Plan to See
This is the friend you still keep in touch with. You probably text him/her every so often and when breaks come around you always plan on hanging out with them. But much like rules, plans are made to be broken with this friend (both by you and by him/her) and you never end up seeing each other quite as much as you thought you would.
3) The Ones You Do See
This is the friend you talk to fairly consistently (a few times a month). You may visit this friend at school and when breaks roll around you actually hang out, maybe even more than once. This is the friend worth keeping because if they’ve decided to remain your friend after all the changes that college brings to you both, they’re just a quality person. Definitely worth keeping around.
Numbers 1 and 3 are pretty easy to maneuver with but number 2 is the one I always have trouble with.
I don’t know when to let a person from category 2 fall into category 1 or when I should fight for them to get bumped up to category 3. Since I can be lazy at times, I usually just let the person decide for themselves. If they never text me again I stop talking to them, if they keep texting me, I keep trying. Of course, that’s not really a good strategy. Some people may text you all the time but that doesn’t mean they are the type of person you want to invest in (sounds harsh but…). On the other hand, some might never text, or when they do it’ll be after a long chunk of time, but that doesn’t always mean you should cut them off completely.
I should apologize since this post will end rather abruptly. I don’t have an answer for when to let people go and when to keep holding on. I wish I did; my life would be much easier.